When Sanna heard me say I wanted to learn to make pulla, she included me the next time she planned to bake, which was less than a week later!
These kind of misunderstandings happen at the university, too. A while ago I wrote an email saying that I would be happy to meet with my colleague Arja to discuss a new project. I was still making plans, but wanted to let her know in case she had a better idea. I thought that we would email back and forth, and perhaps meet later to work out the details. Imagine my surprise when I received an email from Arja two hours later, asking when I was free to meet on Friday!
Due to these misunderstandings, I have learned to be more careful what I say while I am in Finland. I am usually an “ideas person.” I love to talk about potentials and possibilities, and things that could be. Living in Finland has reminded me that my words have value and meaning. If I say that I will do something, I need to be ready to do it right away. Finns are a lot more deliberate than most Americans and prefer to wait until they have considered an idea themselves before speaking up. This is particularly true when Finns are meeting someone for the first time, or do not know the other person well.
When I look at some of the silly, funny, and sometimes serious situations that have resulted from this common cultural misunderstanding, I am reminded that neither approach is really “better” or “worse.” As an American, I like throwing around ideas, and talking about possibilities. While living in Finland, I like knowing that, when my co-workers say that they will email me this afternoon, I will have that email before the end of the day.
