However, I want to focus on one particular expectation that surprised me the most. That is: marriage and children.
In Vietnam, women are generally expected to get married to a man and have children. Some people view this as a goal that everyone needs to achieve. If a woman is still unmarried by the time she has reached her 30's, people will begin to wonder why she is still single. Some people will tell her that she is even too old for marriage! The average age for women in Vietnam to marry at is 22. Interestingly enough, I am 22 and I will be 23 in February! In the United States, the average age for marriage is about 27. I want to be clear that I do not think that getting married at 22 is wrong in any way. It is just from my own perspective that I think women should be able to choose whether or not they want to get married and when they want to get married, whether that is at age 22 or 88. If a woman decides not to get married, I believe that she should be supported and not shamed by family, friends or anyone else. Personally, I do not want to have children or get married. Many people have asked me whether or not I have a boyfriend or if I am married. My answer is always no.
Sometimes, Vietnamese teacher colleagues will tell me about a few men that they think I should go on a date with. Some people might find this to be uncomfortable. I do, but I also have to understand that many people want to make sure that I am happy and not alone. In other words, they are looking out for me. To be honest, I did not always think about those situations in a positive way. I felt embarrassed and confused the first few times I was asked this question.
